Planless

Practicing as much as possible, but I lack an organized plan.  I just sort of wake up and do the usually stretches, plie, relave, some snake arms, 8's, for a few minutes but nothing structured. I know that if I actually made a plan and stuck to it, I would make more progress. Tomorrow, after errands, I think I will make a tape of practice drills so I can compare them over the weeks to come. I haven't watched a Rachel Brice DVD in awhile- and put on the Serpentine today. Wanted to give up in just a few minutes. I think I need to set up a 3 x a week schedule for her and then the other days with my other favorites. I wish more beginners would blog about the challenges..

March, 2012

After one of the top five days in my worst days at work today. Then rushed to week two of beginning belly dance with undulations, tribal camel, with arms, belly roll up. Zills! Traveling with zills. And more chest lifts than I thought was humanly possible. I do enjoy learning new things-but I am a very slow learner. It is just in my nature to analyze things, watch them, think about it and learn it in very slow motion. I was always the last student in nursing school to try the new skill-like starting an IV. I wanted to read about it, study it, learn the rules, the anatomy. Then I wanted to watch every other student do them and hear the critiques. Then I wanted to do it, very slowly and perfectly. It is like that with dance. For instance in learning the 3/4 shimmy- I tried in class and just didn't get it. Then I watched on you tube. Then bought a particular video that I watch often. I practiced until I actually pull either my internal oblique or my psoas and could barely move for weeks and managed to actually cause my belly button to move to the right about an inch or so.
This dance class really moves quickly, and it challenges my nature. I want a long lecture complete with muscle descriptions, anatomy lessons, drawings, demos, what NOT to do and then try whatever move at the slowest possible speed until my form is as perfect as it can be-my knees are bent, pelvis tucked etc. After hours or days or maybe even weeks...I would like to try it at half tempo and move up very slowly.  And at that rate...I won't be dancing much.
So, I have to suck it up. I have to get up earlier to fit in practice before work. Do some serious yoga stretches at lunch at work and come home to Rachel's or Zoe's drills at night. I am going to keep up at Jamballah this year.
Oh, and ZILLS! I didn't get it during class. But at the end, I looked at the pattern written out and said..Oh, you start with 3 1s, then 2, then 1-2..you take away a one every time. She looked at me like I had lost my mind...but I showed her how my mind finally grasped the pattern...not R-R RLR, R RLR, RL, but 11 123, 1 123, 1-2...but in my head it is 3 1s 23, 2 1s 23, 1-2......I actually can't hear the rhythm yet without some serious effort, but it is getting better every day.
Imma belly dancah...a snake charmah...

Hippie Dippie

Started the morning with Drillz that Killz again. Still not understanding what she means by hip drops out, in, neutral. I am searching through some other more basic DVD's to see if I can find this broken down MUCH slower.
Excited that tomorrow after work my medical assistant and maybe my Mom and sister will join me for the beginner belly dance class. The most exciting part of the day, was while I watching a TV program, I was practicing hip drops and my sister, looked at me and said "how did you learn to do that? you must just practice hours a day". Wow! She is such a great dancer at all the family events. I am the one who has always been the WORST dancer in the family. And look at me now! I am actually going to say this.. I am a belly dancer ( okay student, but still I AM a dancer)...
Thought for the day is to use my FLIP camera to monitor my progress and maybe be brave enough to post some of my struggles to learn new moves. You would likely be seeing me in my pajamas...seems to be my favorite dance wear...

Rollng, rolling, rolling- rawhide!

I have it in my mind that one of the most wonderful moves in dance is the undulation, especially reverse undulations or rolling up.  I am convinced that I absolutely cannot dance unless I can do that move. I am generally outgoing, except when it comes to dancing because even when I dance like no one is looking I am self conscious. So, I have watched about a zillion youtubes and several of my belly dance DVDs. I have the reverse beginning to almost look like a recognizable move. So, practice, practice, practice and finally got a mirror yesterday ( I had to leave my old mirrors in my last place) and I have the ' Sit, tuck, upper abs" parts, but the chest? I just don't get it. I am not sure if I am supposed to use my upper back muscles, or my shoulders?  Anasma's description and demonstration is the best that I have seen, but still missing that last little piece.
My weakest link is anything to do with my chest. I watched Zoe forever tonight and tried to keep up with the chest pops, locks, lifts, slides etc, but she always loses me in a few minutes.  I have only had one private lesson with the instructor of my new beginner belly dancing class, but I do remember how much she balances between hips and chest ( and of course arms, hands and shoulders).
I do know that I become easily frustrated when learning some moves. When I am watching/playing DVDs if it gets too hard, I just stop it and do something else. I can't do that in class, which is good. I won't be able to stop the workshops in Portland, so I have to find a way to work through the hard parts.

Expectations

I want so much to be able to express my feelings through dance. I think it is likely unrealistic to expect to be able to move as smoothly as Zoe or Rachel. I am drawn to the big movements. Big round mayas...hips drops like Zoe. But my body is untrained and much older. They have danced since toddler hood and I am starting at the age when most have long since retired.  There is such beauty and grace in Carolina's movements, but my eye struggles to understand the subtle soft movements. Maybe as I watch and learn from different dancers-  I will see the movements more clearly. But now, when I watch her move in DVDs I can't tell if it is Maya or reverse maya..
So, I want my body to make those big smooth slow graceful movements, stretching, posing, spinning and oh, those hands...their hands and arms are mesmerizing.  I want to move like that...and I know that I only have a few years of dancing realistically.  I am trying to be patient, but a part of me feels wistful about the life I did not spend dancing, but it just wasn't the right time for me then. It seems right to me now
It is much more difficult for me now. Yesterday, after practicing hip drops in the morning, I went to work as usual. One of my first patient's was an elderly patient that could not climb on the exam table- so I squated down to examine her feet. When I tried to stand up I could feel the head of my femurs dragging in the acetabulum like knives. I stood up a little wobbly with the realization that someday it will be me that can't get up on the table...but until then I am gonna dance like no one  is looking